touched_by_seshat: (Default)
Title: "As I Am"
Fandom: King Arthur
Characters: Arthur/Guinevere
Words: 1,093
Author's Notes: Written mostly for [livejournal.com profile] wabbitseason who said there was a fic waiting to be written from within Heather Dale's song "Take Me As I Am"





He had been searching for her for most of the day and when he couldn't easily find her, he had become concerned for her and her safety. After almost losing Lancelot in the battle at Badon hill, he wasn't sure how he would deal with it if anything happened to her.

Strange what near death experiences could do to someone, wasn't it?

He finally found her outside the walls, sitting on a hill overlooking the valley below. She was just sitting there, seemingly calm and at peace.

"Guinevere," he called out softly as he approached her, not wanting to startle her into drawing a weapon. She turned her face and something tightened low in him as he took in that smile that she directed his way. He made his way to her side. "May I join you?"

"Of course," she said with a smile. "The hill has plenty of space to make yourself comfortable."

Arthur crouched down at her side, then let himself sit down on the grass next to her. He was silent for a long moment and then looked at her. "How do you fare, lady?"

Guinevere looked at him carefully. "I am doing very well, my lord," she said with all of the politeness and reverence she was sure one must show their future king. However, addressing him this way felt so very strange to her. This was Arthur. This was the man who had rescued her -- and the warrior whom she had fought beside not so many days ago.

"No, Guinevere," he corrected her quietly. "Just call me Arthur. No titles are necessary, not between us."

"You will be king," she said softly, looking out over the grass. "You deserve reverence when one addresses you."

"I will be a man before I will be a king." He watched her profile in silence for a long moment. "Are you unhappy with the idea of your father making me king of your land?"

Startled eyes flew to meet his. "Unhappy? No, Arthur Castus, not in the least. You will be good for this land. You will unite the warring people and bring about greatness from within Briton."

He watched her eyes carefully. "Is something wrong, Guinevere?"

"No... yes... I..." She sighed, plucking at blades of grass. "You look different."

"Because I'm not wearing velvet robes or a crown?"

Guinevere visibly shuddered. "That is a horrid image. It's close to being evil in my mind." She sighed. "No. I'm just not used to seeing you relaxed and out of your regular soldier at war clothing."

Arthur smiled at her and then tipped his head. "As I said, I am still a man before I am any job or duty. This is who I am."

"I know." She looked at him in seriousness. "You didn't seek me out just to sit and talk about what I think of you being the king, Arthur. There is something on your mind."

Arthur nodded at her. "We need to talk about the plans for the future of Briton... and of ourselves."

Guinevere turned startled eyes to his face. "Ourselves?"

"Yes, ourselves." Arthur swallowed in a rare show of nervousness and looked back out over the valley. "You would make a good Queen of Briton, Guinevere."

"Me?" What surprised her was not that she could be a good queen -- her father had told her enough times that he foresaw her destiny in helping to lead Briton into a new time. What surprised her was that it was coming from Arthur.

"You have a tie to the land and the people that I do not," he said without looking back at her. "You love the land and you know the people. They trust you. You would help all of us to find peace with the way the world is now. All we know is war."

"There is more to life than struggle, Arthur," Guinevere said with a soft smile.

"I will be honest. I'm not sure if I am the right person to be made the king, Guinevere. I have known only bloodshed and war here in this place until recently."

"My father says it is my duty to help heal the land and lead at your side."

Arthur shook his head and reached for her hand. "No. I am not asking you to be my Queen because of duty or any kind of pride, my lady." He forced himself to meet her eyes. "I find that I have become attached to you in more ways than I could have imagined since rescuing you from that prison we found you in."

"Arthur, I am not your typical lady," she reminded him. "I'm a warrior, first lady of my people. I am not one to sit inside and be idle. This is my land and these are my people, too. I will not be left behind."

"I have no desire for you to trade one cage for another, Guinevere. I'm asking you to marry me simply because I wish to be with you." He smiled into her eyes. "With you, I know I can do everything that I am needed to do. You remind me that there is light within so many things around us, even if I cannot always see it."

"Do you have any idea what you are asking, Arthur?"

"I just want to know if you can one day love me as the man that I am, Guinevere." He smiled gently at her. "Am I the kind of man that you think you can stand beside?"

"I know I can stand with you, Arthur. I know I can love you... as I already do. You have had my heart since I first set eyes upon you many years ago."

"I'm not perfect, and I'm not golden," he cautioned. "Your people seem to hold high expectations of me, but I am only one man."

"I trust in you," she said softly. "If you can give me an open heart and let me know that you ask because you wish to be with me and not because of some kind of duty, then I will give you that love and that light freely."

"I am asking for your hand out of love and not duty," he said softly. "I can promise you that, Guinevere."

"Then, all that I am I will share with you, Arthur," she answered him just as softly as he had spoken to her.

"I will be a good husband to you," he promised as he moved forward to kiss her. "I promise."


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Touched By Seshat

May 2007

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